Life teaches you different things in stages and I’ve found that often, they’re a sum of our experiences and struggles. For me, I’ve been realising two things lately – what both “constant” and thinking positive really means.
I know it’s silly but I live alone and for the longest time I was scared of the dark. It’s a rather large house and my parents now live overseas. At times I would feel super scared and I would immediately hide under the covers after getting ready for bed, jumping at every single sound. But at other times, I felt totally safe – and the house was just an inatimate object I lived in. This fear was pretty annoying because sometimes I would have it, and sometimes I would not. And it clicked to me one day at the idea of constant. The house is actually constantly just a house, an inatimate object – not scary, just void of feelings or actual life. Yet, it’s my own perspetives and fear that almost bring it to life. It’s like a puppy that doesn’t know what you’re thinking but you are the one who either thinks of the puppy as evil or good but the puppy is just sitting there with wide eyes wondering what you’re thinking when all along you are the one determining your own fear. The house will always be constant, always but it’s my perspectives that change. In that way, I realise that fear could be just something that I have created, almost totally from my own silly little head for things that don’t even deserve that fear.